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= written by Amr Khaled =

3 *  The tribute paid to women 1

The tribute paid to women by Islam (1)

To fear Allah in dealing with wives is never a supererogatory performance that men condescend to whenever they want.  It is a duty that man will be questioned about, just like salat (prayer).  This concept must be settled inside every Muslim who fears Allah.  This is an essay written by Mr. Amr Khaled in Al-Yaqdha  on 28/11/2003, and this is the text of the essay:

What can a Muslim expect to listen from Allah’s Prophet PBUH when he was on his death bed?! I want you to guess before answering! The last words said by Allah’s Prophet PBUH, before his death, were, “Prayers; do not ask your servants to do more than their ability.  Fear Allah in dealing with women, they have aged with you, you have married them and taken then in with the word of Allah” (narrated by Ahmad and Ibn-Majah).  I want to discuss this Hadith in a way that suits the situation where it was mentioned.  In this situation, the little details are hidden, whereas the greater matters are brought under the light.  We must learn never to neglect such great matters due to the big impact this will cause, on our relation with Allah. Among these things come; treating wives.  To fear Allah in treating wives is never a supererogatory performance that man condescends to whenever he wants.  It is a duty that man is questioned about just like salat.  This concept must be instilled inside every Muslim who fears Allah.

I saw that this introduction is important before getting into the details of Islam’s honouring for women as a wives, which I expect to be a surprise for the majority because of the extent of good found in it.  In the pre-Islamic period, women were not in an envied position, they were despised, enslaved, and considered an element of their husband’s legacy.  Bukhary and Abu-Dawud narrated, “If a man died, his companions have right to his wife.  If they want, they marry her or not, or even prevent her from marrying anyone; they have right in her more than her family”, narrated by Bukhary from Ibn-Abbas.  For those living in Madinah, when a married man died, his wife used to be inherited by the one who will inherit his legacy.  He would prevent her from marrying till she pays him money in order to be free.

What did Islam do? It freed women, restored their humanity and dignity back, and removed them from the injustice and distress to which they used to submit helplessly! Listen to the verse in Surat Al-Nisaa (women), that can be translated as, “O you who believe! You are forbidden to inherit women against their will; and you should not treat them with harshness, that you may take away part of the Mahr (the money paid for the bride) you have given them, unless they commit open illegal sexual intercourse; and live with them honourably. If you dislike them, it may be that you dislike a thing and Allah brings through it a great deal of good”. (TMQ, 4:19)[1]. 

“You are forbidden to inherit women against their will”, means that you are not allowed to follow of jahiliyya (the pre Islamic period) in wasting women’s rights, dealing with them as your legacy just like money and slaves, and using them in the way you like against their wills.  “And you should not treat them with harshness, that you may take away part of the Mahr (the money paid for the bride) you have given them”, means that you are not allowed to inherit women, neither confine nor harm them to the extent that they would hate you, nor oblige them to give you money to become free from your domination and suppression.  Islam brought a stop to the contempt women used to live in by establishing a nation that glorifies Allah’s inspiration, a nation that would bring victory to Islam over any backward beliefs or traditions.

The call by, “O you who believe”, was enough to change the path of an entire human society easily, woman’s dignity will not be restored completely unless faith fills the hearts of the individuals in the society where she lives!  This image of insult was not the only one about injustice towards wives, people whose laws did not give women any dignity or honour did not stop at that.   Some of them used to burn the wife, whose husband was dead, alive so she would be buried with him as a sign of faithfulness, to assure that their lives and souls are connected, and if you asked why? The answer will be: she is a wife!!

The wife’s rank in Islam is different from that found in other societies and laws; whether the laws that came before the Islam or those that came afterwards, all over the world.  The English philosopher Herbert Spenser spoke about this in his book Sociology saying, “Men used to sell wives between the fifth and the eleventh centuries A.D.  The church enacted a law that a husband has the right to hire his wife to another man for a limited period of time.”  This law stayed for a long time till it was terminated.  Till recently, women in Europe did not have the right to go to courts, or to issue any contracts, they did not even have the right to sell or buy without their husbands’ written consents.  This was happening in Europe for six centuries before Islam, and four centuries afterwards.  During these four centuries, the Muslim wife lived a life that could never be more honourable, dignified or noble. 

To be continued next week Insha’ Allah.

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