If you want to know, whether you have been accepted in Ramadan or not, observe your home the next two weeks. The best test to your piety is your relations within your home.

In the name of Allah[1], The All-Merciful, The Ever Merciful, do you think being pious can solve our problems at home? Allah (SWT)[2] says what can be translated as, "So, is he who founded his structure upon piety to Allah and all-blessed Satisfaction more charitable, or he who founded his structure upon the brink of a toppling precipice, (and) so it has toppled down with him in the fire of Hell?" (TMQ 9:109)[3] Most of the problems between husbands and wives result from their sins. If you became pious, your relation with your wife will be excellent. The sin brings satan into your home, and drives away the angels. One of the scholars says, "I see the consequences of my sins in the way my wife and kids deal with me." Allah (SWT) says what can be translated as, "And whatever affliction afflicts you, then it is for what your hands have earned; and He is Clement towards much." (TMQ 42:30)

Ibn-Abbas says, "the sin results in a face, a dark heart, and hatred from others, While obeying Allah (SWT) can be seen in a handsome face, and a healthy heart, and love from others." Imam ash-Shafi'y says that whoever commits a sin, Allah (SWT) makes people hate him. If you want to be pious at home, you should ask yourself before doing anything, what is it that pleases Allah (SWT)? After Ramadan, if you help you parents, ask regularly about them, look for what makes them happy and do it, pray for them as Allah (SWT) ordered us, ask about their families and friends, then be surely this will guarantee that your deeds in Ramadan have been accepted. Always do what pleases Allah (SWT) in dealing with your family. I want to whisper a word in the ear of husband, the wife, both of them, youth, and the family.

If you want to know whether Allah (SWT) has accepted you in Ramadan or not, watch the way you deal your wife. Allah (SWT) ordered you to be pleasant to her, and bare her if she is angry. Let's be pious at home by dealing with our wives in a good way. The Prophet (SAWS[4]) says that those who honor their wives are honorable, and those who insult them are wicked. The last words uttered by the prophet (SAWS) were, "Take care of women." He (SAWS) also asks Allah (SWT) to be kind to any one who was kind to those whom he ruled (your wife), and be hard to anyone who was hard on them. The prophet (SAWS) when he married his daughter off to Ali Ibn Abu-Talib, he (SAWS) asked him to be pleasant to her. The prophet (SAWS) said that he is like our father, so bare in mind that he asks you to be pleasant to your wife because she is his daughter. Do not ever send your wife out the house. Allah (SWT) ordered you not to send your wife out the house except if she committed a grave sin. He (SWT) says, "so in case you hate them, then it is possible you may hate something, and Allah sets in it much charity (i.e. benefit). (TMQ 4:19)." One of the followers hated his wife, and left her pregnant. Then he returned 20 years later to find his son a scholar in religion. He regretted those years that he spent away from his son and wife. Do not make Satan defeat you in destroying the relation between you and your wife after Ramadan.

Please your husband. A woman asked the prophet (SAWS) what awards does Allah grant women by? He granted men rewards for praying in the mosque, Jihad[5]...etc. He answered her saying that obeying your husbands equals all of these deeds. The prophet (SAWS) says that the best thing in life is a good wife who makes one happy. He (SAWS) also says that if a woman prayed the five prayers, fasted Ramadan, did not perform adultery, and obeyed her husband, she enters paradise from whichever door she chooses. The prophet (SAWS) also said that if a woman died and her husband is pleased with her, she is in paradise. I was in a funeral of an old woman once. Her husband was crying heavily. He said that during their entire marriage, he always slept pleased with her. She is in paradise.

Do not ever betray your wife. Do not ever betray your husband. On the Day of Judgment, every traitor will hold a banner on which will be written, "I betrayed so and so." The prophet (SAWS) says that he is the third party of any couple unless one betrayed the other. In the al-israa and al-mir'ag[6] he saw men and women eating from rotten meat, and leaving the fresh one, he asked who are those Jibril (AS)[7] (Gabriel)? Jibril said those are the ones, who performed adultery. They practiced what Allah forbade and left what He (SWT) gave them. In the past, when Muslims went to Jihad, they left their wives in Madinah[8]. The prophet (SAWS) said that they are considered as the mothers of those who did not go to Jihad. On the day of Judgment, if anyone betrayed a mujahid[9] and seduced his wife, the mujahid will take from his good deeds as much as he wants. I am addressing both men and women. I am sorry to say that this issue is spreading in our countries. Satan wants to destroy our homes by these forbidden relations. Then, no renaissance will happen because our homes are destroyed because of betrayal. Please, take care of your wife. Take care of your husband. Try to spread love in your home for the sake of your children, and Islam.

Do not ever tear the family because of money or inheritance, or because some one talked bad about you. Try to forgive. Abu-Baker forgave his nephew who talked badly about his daughter Lady Aisha, the prophet (SAWS)'s wife and Allah told him to forgive because your family is more important than anything. If you forgive your family, be sure that Allah forgave you. Be pious!

[1] The word Allah is the Arabic term for God. Although the use of the word "Allah" is most often associated with Islam, it is not used exclusively by Muslims; Arab Christians and Arabic-speaking Jews also use it to refer to the One God. The Arabic word expresses the unique characteristics of the One God more precisely than the English term. Whereas the word "Allah" has no plural form in Arabic, the English form does. Allah is the God worshipped by all Prophets, from Adam to Noah, Abraham, Moses, Jesus and Muhammad.

[2] SWT = Suhanahu wa Ta'ala [Glorified and Exalted Be He].

[3] TMQ=Translation of the Meaning of the Qur'an. This translation is for the realized meaning, so far, of the stated (Surah:Ayah) of the Qur'an. Reading the translated meaning of the Qur'an can never replace reading it in Arabic, the language in which it was revealed.

[4] SAWS= Salla Allah alayhe Wa Salam [All Prayers and Peace of Allah be upon him]

[5] Any earnest striving in the way of Allah, involving personal, physical, intellectual or military effort, for righteousness and against wrong-doing. “Lesser Jihad”: fighting to protect Islam from attack or oppression. In such fighting, no woman, child or innocent civilian is to be harmed, and no tree is to be cut down. “Greater Jihad”: internal struggle for the soul (nafs) against evil and temptation.

[6] the night journey of Prophet Muhammad (SAWS) from Makkah to Jerusalem and his ascension to the seventh heaven.

[7] AS= Alayhe as-Salam [All Peace of Allah be upon him].

[8] : Where the prophet Muhammad (SAWS) emigrated with his companions in 622 AD.

[9] Jihad: Any earnest striving in the way of Allah, involving personal, physical, intellectual or military effort, for righteousness and against wrong-doing. “Lesser Jihad”: fighting to protect Islam from attack or oppression. In such fighting, no woman, child or innocent civilian is to be harmed, and no tree is to be cut down. “Greater Jihad”: internal struggle for the soul (nafs) against evil, e.g. to overcome the temptation to sleep when it is time to pray the morning prayer is a greater jihad. Although jihad comprises lesser and greater jihad, the term mujahideen often refers to those of lesser jihad.

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