Magazine Articles

= written by Amr Khaled =

6 *  The tribute paid to women 4

The tribute paid to women as wives by Islam (4)

The article written by Mr. Amr Khaled, and published in Al-Yaqdha Magazine on the 7^th of January 2004, is as follows:

I shall move on to another aspect of the honor conferred upon women as wives by Islam; namely the services a woman renders to her husband. In Islam, are women obliged to serve their husbands, or are they supposed to voluntarily do so in a fashion that shows their well-breeding?

This topic is thought to be highly sensitive and controversial. Some of the early Muslim scholars are of the view that obliges a woman to serve inside her house, saying that it is her duty to serve her husband with everything he needs. Whereas, others, such as Imam Malik, Ash-Shafiee and Abu Hanifa, said a woman is not obliged to serve her husband with anything. Before saying with which view I am siding, it is worthwhile to say that Messenger of Allah (May Allah's Peace and Blessings Be Upon Him) had assigned the responsibility of managing the household to women.  'Abdullah bin 'Umar  (May Allah Be Pleased With Them) reported The Prophet (May Allah's Peace and Blessings Be Upon Him) as saying, "Everyone of you is a guardian and everyone of you is responsible (for his wards)… a wife is a guardian of her husband's house and she is responsible (for it)…" (Bukhari). So, where and why would contradicted views arise?

Basically, a woman's responsibilities in her managing the household, or as the Prophet (May Allah's Peace and Blessings Be Upon Him) put it, "a wife is a guardian in her husband's house", do not infer that she has to do all the house chores such as cooking, clothes washing and ironing, cleaning and scrubbing. Rather, it implies that her responsibility lies in her supervision over all the above chores.

Whether she does all of the house chores  - or some of them - by herself or with the help of others be it her servants, children, relatives or even the husband himself is dependent upon many factors. Some of these factors include the financial capacity, and the convenience of time for the wife, husband and children, as well as the wife's ability to do them without any risks of exhaustion and hindering other duties such as taking care of the children and raising them properly and others.

This view is consistent with that of Imam Nawawi's, who said, "This stems out of the innate kindness and generosity of human beings. A woman who is offering her husband services such baking, cooking, washing and so on and so forth is actually doing so voluntarily, which manifests her benevolence towards her husband, for it is not her duty to do so, even if she is disinclined to do the house chores, she is never deemed a sinner (Sahih Muslim and Sharh An-Nawawi part 14, p. 164). 

I am not here to raise the roof just for the sake of it. I just want do justice to Islam, and shed light on its forbearance and how highly it reveres women. As far as the Islamic law is concerned, Islam has not obliged women to serve their husbands by themselves. Rather, women are free to willingly do so, and their husbands must be grateful to them for that. I really wish that Muslim women, who have been living up to our expectations, would not use this view as a pretext for laziness and negligence, which might induce problems. Also, I wish that Muslim men would show some support to their wives, in order to make household management as perfect a responsibility as it should be and follow the example of the Prophet (May Allah's Peace and Blessings Be Upon him) who used to help his family. Al-Aswad narrated, “I asked Lady 'Aisha (May Allah Be Pleased With Her) what did the Prophet (May Allah's Peace and Blessings Be Upon Him) use to do at home.” She replied. "He used to keep himself busy serving his family and when it was time for the prayer, he would get up for prayer." (Bukhari). (And in another narration on the authority of Imam Ahmad, when Lady 'Aisha (May Allah Be Pleased With Her) was asked what did the Prophet (May Allah's Peace and Blessings Be Upon him) use to do at home, she replied, " he was only human, he used to mend his clothes and milk the ewe and serve himself" and in another narration, she said, "he used to mend his clothes and shoes and do what all ordinary men usually do at home"). Unfortunately, the misconception implying that it is shameful for a man to help in the house chores has been passed on to us. Such acts are even considered as degrading stigma. Suffice it to say that correcting this devious misconception that has nothing to do with the guidance of Islam and the lifestyle of the Prophet (May Allah's Peace and Blessings Be Upon Him), requires us to transfer the established Islamic rulings from the books to reality. We just do not want to be only listeners and readers who would raise too many eyebrows for what is heard or read.

The honor conferred upon women by Islam has a sweet taste that would only be relished with the company of a committed Muslim husband, who abides by the rules of Islam and never take Allah's verses and signs for granted. Once he hears a command, he would immediately obey, neither would he take it for jesting nor would he think that it is mere education and new stuff to learn.  Rather he would resort to the rulings of Allah (SWT) and His Apostle (May Allah's Peace and Blessings Be Upon him) in order to make them prevail.

(1)     TMQ=Translation of the Meaning of the Qur'an.  This translation is for the realized meaning, so far, of the stated (Surah:Ayah)  of the Qur'an.  Reading the translated meaning of the Qur'an can never replace reading it in Arabic, the language in which it was revealed.

AmrKhaled.net © جميع حقوق النشر محفوظة
This Article may be published and duplicated freely for private purposes, as long as the original source is mentioned. For all other purposes you need to obtain the prior written approval of the website administration. For info: dar_altarjama@amrkhaled.net